A couple of years ago, before we ever attended the church we're at now or even heard of Family Matters or Grace-Based Parenting, Adam came up with a definition of love, based on our faith. Then we found it  written out in a book more articulately than we could ever put it...

           the commitment of my will to your needs and best interests, regardless of the cost.
                                                                                          -Tim Kimmel, Family Matters

I am so thankful that my husband is a questioner, a man who will chew and wrestle and pray about an idea or an issue and will not let go until God has answered him. And I love what this has done for our marriage and our family. (plus...how cute was that baby??)


Diary of a P.A. student('s wife)

I am anxious.
Yet even as I type, I'm fighting a prayer-filled battle NOT to be.
You see, I know it all. I Know my God is bigger, that He cares for this family. I know that He's called us to Phoenix, to PA school, to the way we're navigating these waters with me as a stay-at-home mom. I know He sees the size of our checking account, knows how many weeks are left to go before the next loan dispersment, knows what we need in the meantime.
I know He will provide.
I've seen Him come through for us time and time and time again.
So why do I still grow anxious when I check the bank account and find there's less-much less-than I'd anticipated? WHY do I allow fear to creep in, to take over my attitude, to lash out when all that is needed is to trust?
Get away from me, anxious heart...trust in your Lord!
Quiet down, frantic mind...listen for your Lord!
Have peace, oh my soul...He knows 
and sees
and cares

God is putting me through a season of heavy loads 
     so that I can finally see how much unnecessary extra I've carried my whole life.
He is allowing PA school to refine me, and my husband, even as the Lord prepares us for a different kind of life on the other side of all this.
(Because there is another side, and all of this has a purpose.)

You know those prayers you pray sometimes...the ones that echo King David's prayers, that earnestly cry out, 
Search me,O God, and know my heart;
    try me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24)

   I prayed that many months ago. I pray it still today. He heard, still hears, and is answering. Like gold being refined...at times it's hot and uncomfortable and I cry out. Once it's over, though! So precious, what comes out of that Fire! As I learn to replace His truths with the lies I've believed for so long-in so many areas of my life-it is fire. But through the fire
              comes the freedom. And oh, the Lightness of that freedom.

And now, pictures of my adorable children (at least, I think they are) to end this post on a lighter note...